This week a study came out that concluded eating eggs is as dangerous as smoking cigarettes. Assuming this is true, we need Pat Quinn to call a special session of the legislature to deal with this urgent problem. (The mayor and city council need to deal with it immediately as well).

We need the following legislation to be drafted and passed ASAP.

1. We need to have a law in place that prohibits eating of eggs in public places.
2. We need a law that eggs must be kept in a separate locked case and only sold to those who can prove they are over 18.
3. We need to greatly increase the tax on eggs (and use the money to help restore cuts in Medicaid).
4. It should be illegal to eat an egg product (i.e. an Egg McMuffin) in your car if children are present (everything gives off the random molecule now and then and we must be sure children are not being harmed by second hand egg eating).
5. We need to prohibit the sale of eggs on the internet for fear that children might lie to get them illegally (take that Peapod!)
6. The attorneys for city and state need to sue egg farmers for the way they have deceived us for years (about 10,000 to be exact) telling us it was ok to eat eggs when in fact they were selling us a deadly product (and what about Eggland and their "enhanced" eggs?).

I am sure that legislators can find many more laws urgently needed in this area.

p.s. Since many many studies have proven that stress is a major factor in many diseases and since studies that make us worry about things like eggs certainly produce some stress in people who like to eat things like eggs - how about a study about how dangerous such studies are for public health? I would venture a guess that such a study would show that studies are as dangerous to our well being as eating eggs or smoking cigarettes.